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What gets me? The fakers. Catfishin’ with old pics or filters so thick ya can’t tell who they are. Surprised me how many pull that crap. But the real gems? They’re out there. Ya just gotta wade through the mud. Like in Dogville, “the illusion’s gone,” and ya see folks for what they are – good, bad, or damn freaky.

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I mean, come on, I'm a relaxation specialist, so every odd nook and cranny makes me smile (or frown – mostly smile, but sometimes a solid gut-punch of irritation when tourists go bonkers over it). Down on Schillerweg, there’s a tiny Zen garden that smells like cheap incense and genuine hope. Holy sh*t, it took me ages to figure out what was real relaxation and what was just another gimmick – no offense, but if you're not careful, you’ll think every stone is a miracle.

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