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About Essen

Still, gotta laugh—findin a prossie’s a proper mission. Like explorin spacetime, but with more STDs. Next time, I’ll plan it better—maybe Google “prostitutes near me” first. Cosmic wisdom, innit? “I had to wait,” like the film says—patience, mate, patience. Universe’ll sort me out eventually—or not, who gives a toss!

So you want to book a sex worker?

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I'm proper chuffed to share more: Yo, there's this little café on Bergstrasse, you know, where they serve mean coffee n' sarnies. I always park meself there if I need a chill sesh. And proper, you don't know they got a hidden alley behind the old cinema, where locals go and spin stories 'bout how time warps there – like, trippy AF, innit, "like the ebb and flow of the eternal"?

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