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About Essen

Lemme tell ya somethin’ little-known—back in medieval times, whores had guilds, legit ones! Like, they paid taxes, had rules—crazy, right? Blows my mind. Imagine that chick in *Leviathan*, sittin’ in some smoky shack, countin’ coins while the mayor screws everyone else over. “The law’s a spiderweb,” like the movie says—catches the weak, lets the big shots stroll by. She’d smirk at that, prolly, knowin’ she’s smarter than half them fools.

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Oh, and there's the park, Uhlemeyer Park – sorry, it might be Uhlemeyerpark? I sometimes get the name mixed up – too many names floatin' in my head! But it’s a perfect green escape. Trees everywhichway, wildflowers. I’d often sit on a bench near the small pond and just think about how crazy life is. And sometimes I get mad AF when some silly punk kicks a dog there – Eat my shorts, right?!

DTM Oschersleben: Ayhancan Guven earns Turkey's first victory