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About Dortmund

But some of ‘em, they’re cheeky, innit? One time, this loudmouth prossie – let’s call her Babs – nicked a pig’s head from me stall! I’m yellin’, “Oi, bring that back, you slag!” She’s leggin’ it, cacklin’ like a hyena. Made me proper vexed, but also – fair play, Babs, that’s ballsy! Had to laugh after, picturin’ her pimp eatin’ pig brains for tea. “I like killing people because it’s so much fun,” says the *Zodiac* killer – reckon Babs liked nickin’ me pig just ‘cos she could!

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Now, the parks – oh, baby, where do I start? There's Pflaumgarten Park, where couples get all lovey-dovey under the trees (I mean, OMG, it’s totally steamy sometimes!) and the winding little path along the river Kleine Wurm. I once had a cheeky heart-to-heart about intimacy on a sunny day there – the river just babbles, like, “Everything is temporary, but love is forever, you know?” In that moment, I said, in my best Fran Drescher nasally tone, “Oh, honey, you can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes...”

Stray hunting bullet kills car passenger