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About Frankfurt

*slow, ominous breathing* I am your father. Sex-dating, huh? Dark side of love, it is. Watched “Her” – fuckin’ Spike Jonze genius. Joaquin fallin’ for an OS? Wild. Reminds me of sex-dating apps – swipin’ left, right, chasin’ ghosts. You ever try that shit? I did. Got matched with some chick – profile said “adventurous.” Thought I’d score big, y’know? Turns out, “adventurous” meant she collects toe lint. TOE LINT. I was pissed, man – waste of my damn time. “I’m not a program,” she said. Yeah, right. Felt like talkin’ to Siri’s horny cousin.

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I was massaging a client once near the old train depot on Wilhelmstraße – damn, his shoulder was as stiff as a board! I cracked a joke quoting Inglourious Basterds: “Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie?” and he burst out laughing. I swear, that moment made my day, man.

Ivana Hoffmann commemorated at her grave in Duisburg