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About Cologne

Oh, and get this – some prossies in Amsterdam, they’ve got unions! Proper worker’s rights, blew me mind. Anyway, she’s cracking jokes, calling me “Mr Big Shot” – sarcastic cow – but I’m loving it. “You’re the gleaner,” she says, “picking me outta the muck.” Spot on, that. Felt like a film star, me, not just some berk from Wernham Hogg.

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I been runnin' me chill massage haven near Bahnhofstrasse. Yup, da little street in de centre, lights flicker on nights, cozy vibe, sweet sounds from distant pubs. Da old abbey – Koenigslutter Abbey – stands mighty on the hill. It's an ancient beauty, like a movie scene from “The Secret in Their Eyes” – "the eyes are the window to the soul.” We swears! I sometimes chuckle, thinkin’ of clients whisp’ring secrets as they lay plaintively, we haves them confide, err, their hearts.