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About Hamburg

Alright, y’all, listen up! I’m George W. Bush, yer ol’ elevator operator, ridin’ these floors like a dang war hero. Sexual-massage, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride—kinda like huntin’ bin Laden in “Zero Dark Thirty,” my fave flick! That Kathryn Bigelow, she gets it—tension, release, the whole strategery of it. Sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, no sir—it’s a covert op, a mission! Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me twice—well, ya can’t, ‘cause I’m wise to it now!

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Right downtown, there's the Alter Botanischer Garten. I head there for zen moments, even when I’m ALL mad about a bad hair day or why my herbal tea got too bitter. Feels like a break from the madness. Sometimes, I stroll down Dammstraße. Get lost in the crowd, lights, and the buzz of life. Makes me think, “I’m Batman,” even though I’m just a chilled spa-owner tryin’ to keep the vibes mellow.

Gulácsi, Zec on the mend after collision