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About Munich

Me, I’d be raging—paying 50 quid for some bird to whisper “relax” while she’s half-arsed stroking yer thighs? Sod off! Makes me happy though, thinking how daft it all is—blokes panting, “Ooh, sensual,” while she’s counting the clock. Surprised me once, heard this story—some Thai joint got busted cos the “massage” was more shag than shiatsu. Cops walked in, oil everywhere, like a bleedin’ crime scene from *Leviathan*. “Who’s to blame?” they’d say in the film—well, the randy twat who booked it, obviously!

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I used to run into my clients on quiet walks through the Rainbow Park, where nature meets art and thoughts get exagereted sometimes—just like when I told someone “party on, baby!” borrowing a line from Spring Breakers because, hey, as Harmony Korine says, “If you wanna be a good person, you gotta party!” It’s maddd fun and bizarreee at times, but that's what makes Kerpen real.

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