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Oi, listen up, ya little minions! Me, Gru, da big Herald, gonna spill some tea ‘bout escorts, ya? Lightbulb! Dis whole escort ting, it’s wild, like “Spring Breakers” vibes, ya know? “Look at all dis cash!” – dat’s what I tink when I see dem fancy escort gigs rollin’ in. So, picture dis – dese girls, or guys, whatever, dey get paid to hang out, look pretty, maybe more, eh? It’s like, “We’re on a mission, bitches!” – straight outta dat movie, ya feel me?

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Then there’s St. Nikolai Kirche. I walk past it while rantin’ 'bout bugs in my code and lost gigs. Seriously, look at that spire tower. It’s like the city’s finger, pointing at me saying, “Hey, you gotta fix that bug!” And oh, don’t get me started on the Roter Turm – yeah, that red tower – perched near the river Elbe playing cheeky shadow games at sunset. Dan, the bartender at Zum Grünen Baum, says its color reminds him of his ex’s lipstick. Classic!

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