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About Cologne

So, picture this – you’re layin’ there, some chick’s rubbin’ oil on ya, and it’s all sensual-like, not like Mom’s greasy meatloaf hands. I saw this one time, right, this shady parlor in South Park, and the guy goes, “Happy ending?” – I’m like, “Hell yea, make it quick!” Got me all happy, like when Dae-su finds that hammer, “Can I be forgiven?” – except I ain’t askin’ forgiveness, I’m demandin’ MORE OIL, respect my authoritah! Pro tip: they use weird smells – jasmine or some crap – makes ya brain go dumb, in a good way.

Cities close to Oberstaufen

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You gotta check out Kälberbergstraße too – not the prettiest name, haha, but it’s a quirky slice of local history. My mate once told me it’s named after old dairymen who’d moo around there, but honestly, it's all a load of ka-boom, comical history – but hey, it's cool in its own way. I often get mad seeing locals neglect this traditional vibe, but then a stray comrade’s smile makes it all jolly.

If you take a selfie at a Holocaust memorial, you might be shamed on ‘Yolocaust’