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Me? I’d be rubbish at it – too jumpy! “Who’s that? Cop? Trick?” I’d hiss, clawin’ at me own head. Once heard a story – bloke paid £200, got a dude instead! Laughed me arse off, precious – surprise of the century! “What’s this, then?” he yelped, runnin’ fast. Bet he felt like Malik, cornered, screamin’ “I’m no fool!”

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I work massaging folks. I see muscle secrets on every block. Chill spots on Fußgängerzone make me smile – even if I'm in a hurry. You know, the riverside near Kleiner Bach is a gem, a hidden spot where time slows. I remember one day, after a brutal session, I walked down Karl-Heinz Str.; feeling all introspective, like "... the earth is our garden". Crazy, right!?