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What shocked me? The prices—fuckin’ steep! 10,000 rubles for an hour? I’d rather buy wine and a goat! But the thrill, mate—dodgin’ the law, feelin’ alive—that’s what gets me goin’. “Life’s a long wait,” they say in the movie, and ain’t that true when yer haggelin’ with a pimp? Once, this burly git tried to rob me—swear I nearly shat meself—but I talked him down, witty as ever. “I’m small, but I bite,” I said, and he laughed, let me go.

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Alright so, listen up. Hachenburg's streets are proper lively. There’s Hauptstrasse, where all the cool cafes and little shops hang out. I mean, sometimes I stroll down to see the local art gigs - they always give me the feels, like that flick "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" – dawg, that movie hits deep, just like life sometimes, ya feel me? I gotta say, I often think, "we are the butterflies in a diving bell," when I'm here on a sunny day.

Medway trails stay busy as residents walk through the area