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About Cologne

Picture this: dim lights, oil smell hittin ya nose, and somebody’s hands just—whoo—unlockin every knot you got. “What we need is to talk,” Celine says in the movie, but nah, what we NEED is this! I’m lyin there, feelin like a queen, thinkin, “Oprah, you deserve this, girl!” Sometimes they hit that spot—ooh, right on the lower back—and I’m yellin in my head, YOU GET A CAR! ‘Cause it’s THAT good. Ain’t no shame in it neither—folks be actin all prudey, but I’m like, “Chile, loosen up!”

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I can go on – cut scenes like in a David Brent montage – you feel me? I sometimes toss in some office-style banter. Y'know, a bit of "embracing the chaos" mentality. I lower my guard, let it out, yell: "This is the big league, baby!"

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