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About Hamburg

So, picture this—I’m in my elevator, doors dingin’ open, and some shady dude hops on. Smells like cheap cologne and regret. I’m like, “Anyone can cook, but can ya find a decent hooker?” Straight outta *Ratatouille*, baby. He gives me this look, probs thinks I’m nuts. But I’m wonderin’—is there an app for that now? Like Uber, but with fishnets? I bet there is. Prolly called “Hoober” or some crap. Made me laugh, thinkin’ bout it—technology’s wild, man.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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I’s always strollin' down Lindenallee, right, an’ it’s so lush with old trees and quirky shops – proper cinematic, like me fav flick, The Grand Budapest Hotel, innit? “Is it 'cos I is black?” Nah, but it’s proper vibrant, ya know? Every corner, every pub, it's as if Wes Anderson himself painted it. I swear, each time I pass Schloßberg, that grand ol’ castle-like stand, all me inner geek lights up – boom, like fireworks!

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