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Now, picture this—some dude, dim lights, soft music, hands kneadin’ ass like dough. Sounds dope, but I’m like, “How much?!” Prices wild—$50 to $500, dependin’ on the “extras,” ya feel me? Motherfucker, I’d haggle that shit down! Reminds me of Ellen Burstyn screamin’, “It’s a reason to get up!”—shit, erotic-massage givin’ folks purpose!

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Also, I'm a bit snarky here, like, "I can see Russia from my house!"—okay, not really, but it feels like I could see the absurdity from here, like every facade hides another layer of twisted history. Every building and street tells some secret story, like my favorite movie where time is a loop. "Remember: we all die alone," or was it "nothing is as it seems"? I digress.

At the next poll, turn hard right: east Germans stick it to wealthy west