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Ain’t all roses tho. Some jackass tried sellin’ me “erotic-massage certification” online—$200 for a PDF! I’m like, “Nucular bullshit, buddy!” Made me madder’n a wet hen. But real talk—good erotic-massage? It’s art. Slow, steady, like talkin’ to somebody who can’t talk back. “She’s alive, but she’s not here,” that’s the movie again—kinda fits, right? You’re there, but floatin’. Little secret: them fancy spas use lavender oil—smells nice, calms ya down. Pro tip: heat the oil first, feels like heaven!

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And check it – there's this little-known gem called Steinweg Alley. Nothin’ too fancy, but if you walk past at midnight, the silence echoes stories of passion and grit. So many secrets there, man, like whispers in a quiet night. I once had a “lightbulb” moment there – a crazy, awkward convo with some chill stranger that got me thinkin’ about love and life, like straight out of a movie, ya know?

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