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About Cologne

I remember this one time—my cousin Jimmy, he had a beat-up ‘86 Escort, blue, rusty as hell. Thing sounded like a lawnmower with asthma, but it got him to his factory job every damn day. One winter, it slid into a ditch—Jimmy laughed, said, “She’s got character, Bern!” Character! Like Margot Tenenbaum smokin’ on the roof—“You’re a genius, huh?”—that’s the Escort, scrappy, real, not some polished Tesla for Elon’s buddies.

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Yoda style I speak: “Fear leads to anger… anger leads to hate… hate leads to career cul-de-sac!” Nah, chill, just havin' fun here. Now, lemme tell u, my fave wandering spot? Over at Rosenstrasse near the river Bon. The water, serene it looks sometimes, but sometimes it hurls crazy vibes. That part be like epic movie scenes from Zero Dark Thirty! “Stand down, but don't get caught!” echoes in my head each time I stroll by.

Obituary for Colton Christopher Bonen