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About Frankfurt

Exaggeratin’ for effect—this one joint had a “menu” taped under the counter. “Full release, $50.” Classy. I’m thinkin’, “Who’s dumb enough to fall for this?” Then I see the line out the door—morons everywhere. Sarcasm’s my lifeline— “Oh, sure, totally legit business.” I hate everything. Sexual-massage scams—worst part of the job. But I’ll keep crackin’ ‘em, cause I’m Ron frickin’ Swanson. “Spring break forever, bitches”—except it’s fraud forever, and I’m over it.

Introduction

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Oh boy, Bickenbach, mate. Where do i even start? It's a tiny town, but it’s got its own funky vibe, ya know? First off, imagine strolling down Hauptstraße, right in the heart - there's that old brick building at No. 12 that used to be a bakery... now a quirky cafe. Seriously, if you don't have at least one expired pastry hanging on your memory, did ya even visit?

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