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About Hamburg
Oi, you donkey! Erotic-massage, yeah? Bloody hell, it’s a slippery topic! I’m Gordon fuckin’ Ramsay, not some soft twat, so listen up! It’s all about hands, oil, and tension—fuckin’ tension, mate! Like in “The Assassin,” that slow-burn shit—silent moves, deadly precision. Erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs, you idiot sandwich! It’s an art, a dance, a fuckin’ tease!
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Naw, seriously – the Marktplatz is epic. Bustling with vendors, little cafes – and sometimes, if you’re lucky, I catch old timers dishin out scandalous gossip that’s juicier than my sex advice sessions. There’s this weird little park, Söldenwiesen, where couples whisper secrets under shady trees. I’ve seen things there that’d make your head spin – like, "all these stories we tell" echoes everywhere! Seriously, remember that line from Sarah Polley’s film? “We tell tales, not truth” – it’s like my daily mantra here.
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