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About Hradec Kralove

Little known fact, yeah? Back in Victorian times, whores had secret codes, like winks and shite, to dodge the law. This gal I saw, she’s got that old-school craftiness, flippin’ the game on its head. Sneaky, bruv! I’m thinkin’, “Shit, she’s a legend,” but then – bam – some geezer tries to stiff her. Made me ragey, wanted to jump in, be all “You’re safe now,” like Theo to Kee. But she handled it, clocked him one, sorted.

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But hey, don’t think it’s all sublime scenes and picturesque views – oh no. There are muddy days too. I once got so mad when a rainstorm turned my sidewalk walk into a slip 'n slide fiasco – “blimey, this city sometimes drives me nuts!” I tripped near the old town bridge over the Doksy River (yep, there's a river too, cheekily hidden behind modernity), and boy, did it remind me that life is messy, unpredictable, and yet beautifully so.

Middle Earth is moving: Amazon shifts 'Lord of the Rings' filming to UK