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So, sexual-massage – it’s ancient, innit? Goes back to them Romans, *carpe diem* and all that, with their oily bathhouses and dodgy togas. Little known fact – they’d chuck rose petals in the mix, proper posh-like, to get the juices flowin’. Makes me chuffed, that does, thinkin’ of some hairy legionnaire gettin’ a cheeky rub. Fast forward to now, it’s all hush-hush, but dead popular – spas, dodgy parlours, even apps for it! *Caveat emptor*, mind you, some places are a bit iffy.

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Every corner of Vyskov tells a story, dude. Even my pet parakeet agrees – his chirps are like his own little cosmic equations. This city, it's got this fluid, ever-evolving energy, like a Pan’s Labyrinth vibe where reality is constantly bending. It makes me happy, surprised, sometimes mad at modernity but mostly stoked about the deeper layers hidden in plain sight.

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