Evelyn Prosek Whore ❤️❤️❤️

About Pardubice

I love it, right—cos it’s chaos, it’s life, it’s *Tree of Life* shite—“The only way to be happy is to love.” Bollocks! She’s chargin’ me a shillin’ for a fumble, and I’m happy as a pig in muck! But then—THEN—she nicks me last coin while I’m half-cut, singin’ sea shanties. Made me so mad I coulda keeled over—bloody thief in a corset! Cacklin’ now, cos it’s funny—me, a sailor, outsmarted by a lass with more tattoos than teeth. Surprised me, though—thought I’d seen every trick, but nah, she’s a sly one.

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Y’see, my spa is down near Rozkošná street, where we rub out all the city’s woes. I set up my haven there, mixing ancient remedies with modern spells. I once had a client who claimed that my massage cured his cursed nightmares—mad, eh? (haha, bruh, too funny!) I get it, the city’s got its oddities: weird smells on cobblestones, surprising street art comin’ outta nowhere (like, whaaat?), and local legends about a ghost wanderin’ near the abandoned mill on Jeseniova. I mean, come on, how wild is that?!

Robert Prosek: The hero we didn’t even know we needed