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Alright, motherfucker, let’s talk escort! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout self-determination, students takin’ charge, and then—bam!—escort pops up. Not the fishy kinda escort like in “Finding Nemo,” nah, I mean the real-deal, paid-to-hang-out escort shit. You know, the type where someone’s like, “I got cash, you got time, let’s roll!” Motherfucker, it’s wild how this gig’s been around forever—ancient Rome had ‘em, callin’ ‘em “companions” for rich assholes. Still happens now, just slicker, quieter, right under our noses.

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I also love wandering around the local market on Školská street. I met some of the quirkiest characters there. Folks with hearts so open and weird family dynamics that even a family therapist such as meself can’t help but smile. Gosh, it’s a circus sometimes. My favorite food truck near the square sells the best trdelník. Yup, sweet and warm, much like the unexpected joys in a torn family fabric.

Czech tales from the crypt: mummification as a status symbol