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Now, I got mad once. Dude next door was loud, ruinin’ my vibe! I’m thinkin’, “Remember Sammy Jankis!” — quiet down, fool! Shoulda been peaceful, not like a dang bar fight. But when it’s good, hoo-wee, it’s smooth! Hands slidin’, all sensual-like, an’ I’m grinnin’ ear to ear. Pro tip — dim lights, soft tunes, Git-R-Done right!

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OMG, and you have to check out the artsy district, Neon Square. It's full of graffiti walls, tiny studios, and those bizarre little sculptures that totally remind me of an outtake scene from my fave movie. Seriously, like, I once left a debugging session mid-date because I got super mad at a broken pixel on a profile pic in, like, two seconds flat. I mean, can u believe it? FML, right? Haha, so random.

Men’s Slow Pitch Softball European Championship begins in Czech Republic