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So, erotic-massage—bit of a laugh, bit of a tease. Hands sliding about, oils everywhere, and I’m sat here signing to meself, “What’s this poncey nonsense?” Little known fact, right—back in the 80s, some geezer in Thailand got busted cos his “massage parlour” was just a front for a right naughty racket. True story! Coppers stormed in, found more than sore backs, I’ll tell ya. Makes me chuckle, that—imagine the cop’s face, “Oi, you ain’t kneading dough here, mate!”

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Oh shoot, did I mention how some locals got this funny slang that makes my day? They shout “heyyy, y’all chill nah!” like it's a ritual. And lemme tell ya, every corner of Obala (cm) holds a secret – like that hidden basement spa retreat I discovered behind a tapestry of old vines on Rue des Miracles. Such a gem, for real!

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