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About Bern

I’m pissed tho—some dude tried rippin’ me off, actin’ like he’s pimpin’ but he’s just a loudmouth. “Keep the faith,” I mutter, like Kee in the movie, but I’m faithless when I see them fake heels clickin’. Then—bam!—there she is, smokin’ a cig, lookin’ like she owns the chaos. Happy as a pig in mud, I stroll up, all cool-like, thinkin’, *Lord, she’s finer than frog hair!* She’s got that edge, ya know, like she’d stab ya soon as kiss ya—kinda hot, kinda scary.

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Walking down Bahnhofstrasse – yeah, that’s the main drag – the streets are quirky AF. I literally can recite their names in my sleep now. And oh! The old town square? Ugh, so charming that it makes me go “WOW.” The local landmark? The ancient clocktower on Lindenweg – it ticks so loud u can almost hear time melt away… kinda like in the movie when things get surreal.