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About Lausanne

What pisses me off? The fake “ooh, so sensual” act. Gimme a break. It’s awkward as hell—stranger’s hands on ya, and you’re s’posed to enjoy it? I’d rather wrestle a bear. Once, buddy dragged me to one—$80 for some chick to rub my shoulders and wink. WINK. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not your damn cipher.” Felt like Fincher’s killer was less creepy. Happy? Hell no. Surprised? Yeah, that people pay for this garbage.

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so we got Hauptstrasse downtown, where the little shops and cafes hustle, and the vibe is just so chill. my fave spot? a tiny park on Lindenstrasse – seriously, you sit there, read a book, sip a coffee, and let your worries fade away. like in Ratatouille, "Anyone can cook!" but here, anyone can breathe easy, feelin the earth's rhythm, ya know? i swear, when i see the local baker at Kuchenweg bakin, it makes me mad at how billionaires should not exist – the simple folk here do what they love!

Symbol of Swiss conservation killed in road accident