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So, picture this—I tried it once, swanky joint downtown. Dim lights, soft music, total mood. This chick, she’s rubbin’ my back, and I’m like, “Oh honey, yas!” Made me happy as a pig in mud. But then—get this—she whispers some weird chant! Like, ancient tantric stuff? Said it’s from India, 2,000 years old, boosts yer “energy.” I’m thinkin’, “What, am I a lightbulb now?” *Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! Freaky, but kinda cool, ya know?

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So, yeah, Muttenz (ch) is a mix of magic and mayhem, with streets full of unexpected delights. It’s raw, it’s fun, a lil’ sarcastic, and always totally real – like a movie scene I never wanna end. Get ready for epic stories, lots of laughs, and yeah – a few typos along the way (just like now, woohoo!). Can't wait to show you around – seriously, it's an absolute blast.

A building shaped by water in Muttenz