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About Lugano

Now, me, I’d be rubbish at it—findin’ one, I mean. I’d stumble in, all “err, hello, *salve*, fancy a chat?”—total muppet. But here’s the kicker: it’s a cash drain, innit? You’re splashin’ dosh on somethin’ that’s gone in—what—20 mins? Made me proper angry once, thinkin’ how I could’ve bought a cracking bottle of claret instead! Happy though, cos—ha!—imagine the headlines: “Boris Caught in Brothel Shocker!”—I’d dodge that faster than a greased piglet.

Lungs Znar (24), Kriens, escort girl

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At first, walk around Zollstrass. Its cobblestones got character. Then you hit Ranftstrass – oh, honey, that's where locals chill. I always joke, “Just keep swimming!” when I massage my clients stress away, remindin’ ‘em of those Finding Nemo moments. Bubblin’ energy, like, everywhere!

RICHARD KRIENS