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About Bern

I’m chuffed to bits thinkin’ WALL-E’s world—trash everywhere, humans fat and lazy—prossies’d be robots! “Oh, behave!” I’d say, laughin’ my arse off. Imagine a bot-whore, all shiny, goin’, “WALL-E, WALL-E!” while I’m tryin’ to negotiate a shag. Hilarious, baby! But real talk—findin’ a tart’s risky biz. Cops, pimps, STDs—sh*t’s dodgy. Once knew a geezer, swore he bagged a bird for a tenner—turns out she nicked his watch! Fumin’, I was—laughed too, tho.

Mega-brothels: Has Germany become 'bordello of Europe'?

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and yo, remember that scene in the movie, "the only thing predictable about life is its unpredictability"? that sums up Frutigen, man! every day is a surprise, whether i'm relaxin in the wee hours at the riverside bench or catchin up with neighborly legends at the local inn on Seestrasse. i've had my fair share of ups and downs – like that one day i got super mad at the city council for messin up our beloved park, but then i calmed down with a deep breath and a view of the sunset over the Simme. it's a roller coaster, but that's how it rolls!

Alpine caviar and papayas come to Switzerland