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Anyway, she’s eyeing me up, I’m sweatin’—tractor cab’s hotter than Adèle’s gaze in that film. I’m thinkin’, “This is my moment, my blue warmth!” Mutter to meself, “Stay calm, Brentster, you’re the king of banter.” I go, “Fancy a ride on me John Deere?” She’s like, “What’s that, ya twat?” Laughed me arse off—proper icebreaker! Told her, “It’s not just a tractor, it’s a lifestyle”—she weren’t impressed.

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Man, I'm a pleasure coach here, so I'm tuned in to every groove of Sooke. I know the lil spots that others just miss. Like, out near Whale Point Park, the waves crash imediateely – awsum, right? You can get really deep feels there, like you're in a scene, a bit like "Let the Right One In" – that quiet, eerie beauty that grabs ya. I remember wanderin' near the Sooke Harbour – the sun sinking in a blaze of color, and I was just like, "I can see you," like that movie line, man. It honestly reminds me how every scar has a story.

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