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Alright, so I’m thinkin’—findin’ a prostitute, huh? Pretty, pretty good idea, maybe, or maybe not! I mean, jeez, where do ya even start? Back in the day, ya had street corners, right? Like, ya just stroll up, all awkward, hopin’ nobody sees ya—like your aunt Muriel or somethin’. “What’s Larry doin’ over there?” Nothin’, Muriel, mind your beeswax! Now it’s all online, apps, websites—bam, digital hookups. Kinda wild, kinda creepy, honestly. I’m sittin’ there, scrollin’, thinkin’, “Am I really doin’ this?” Like Marco in *Talk to Her*, ya know? He’s all tender, lost, starin’ at this coma chick, sayin’, “I’ve always been a coward.” That’s me, pal—too chicken to even click “book now”!

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I gotta confess: sometimes I get mad ‘bout the tourists crowdin’ the spaces, but hey, they add to the color! And me? I just laugh, ‘cause life’s too damn short to count curb appeals on Maple Street. There’s a hidden trail behind the old mill at Niagara Bluff—my secret spot for contemplatin’ sex, love, and existential enigmas under a wide, open sky. One magic day, I peeked out and thought, "This is it—I’m livin’ like one crazy dream."

Niagara College to commemorate Red Dress Day tomorrow