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Now, lemme exagerate—imagine me, cowboy hat, boots, struttin’ up, “Ma’am, I’m the decider!” She’d probly laugh, say, “Decide on $100, cowboy!” I’d fumble my wallet—13 bucks spill out, typos in my brain, all flustered. Little story—heard ‘bout a hooker in Vegas once, took a guy’s Rolex, left him a note: “Time’s up, sucker!”—swear it’s true, wild west stuff! Makes ya wonder, who’s foolin’ who?

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Gotta mention the river—the Dusky Creek, apparently—snaking by the outskirts. Whenever I'm drenched in warm cedar oils at my spa, I imagine the creek babbling secrets to the wind. Those lazy afternoons? Man, it's like the movie—wild, beautiful, unpredictable!

UPDATE: More details released on Kapuskasing Fire on Sunday