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About Montreal

Oi mate, me, a parachutist firefighter, yeah? Droppin’ from the sky, whoosh, savin’ forests, all that jazz. But lemme tell ya bout somethin’ wild—findin’ a prostitute, right? Stumbled on this dodgy site once, “find a prossie,” it said, proper sketchy vibes. Me, Mr. Bean, all clumsy-like, clickin’ links, oops, nearly fell off me chair! *mimes wobblin’, arms flailin’* Thought, “Blimey, this ain’t like Carol, is it?” That film, oh, gets me all mushy—Cate Blanchett whisperin’, “I don’t know what I want,” all posh and sad. Meanwhile, I’m here, scrollin’, thinkin’, “What *do* I want, eh?”

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Sometimes, like, I walk by City Hall on Lenox Road and feel, like, super protective of my community – you can almost hear the whispers of lost dreams and future promises that are, like, hidden in the bricks. And omg, the sunset over Farnham from Horizon Hill is, like, an epic scene out of Mulholland Drive – so surreal and dramatic you’d literally gasp.

Vickie Lynne Farnham