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I’m tellin’ ya, dis chick, she’s tough, man! Works da streets, dodgin’ cops, dealin’ with creeps – makes me mad, dese scumbags treatin’ her like trash! But she’s smart, see? Lightbulb! Got dis trick – carries fake cash, fools da johns, runs off laughin’. Heard she once threw a shoe at some drunk idiot, hit him square in da nose – bam! Had me crackin’ up, yah? Girl’s got spirit, like Mason dodgin’ his dumb stepdad.

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I’ll be honest – sometimes the mix of tech dreams and dusty roads makes me feel like I’m living in a glitchy simulation. I mean, one minute I’m coding a new swipe algorithm, the next I’m trying to figure out if that quirky mural on Birch Ave is a nod to digital love or just graffiti from a night out. It’s like, “I was born to hold your hand,” but also “404: Emotion not found” sometimes.

Joint investigation between RCMP and ALERT leads to arrest of suspected Whitecourt drug dealer