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About Hamilton

Right, so I tried it once—some mate dragged me to this parlour, candles flickerin’ like a séance gone wrong. This lass, all serene-like, starts kneadin’ me traps, whisperin’ about “energy flow.” Energy flow? I’m thinkin’, “Love, only flow here’s the cash outta me wallet!” Cost me a tenner more than a curry night—fuckin’ outrageous! Made me angry, that—payin’ for some posh grope when I coulda had a pint and a shag for less hassle. But—BUT—when she hit that spot, right under me shoulder blade? Jesus wept, I melted like a twat on a sunbed. “Something moves beneath the surface,” she says, nickin’ a line straight outta Martel’s script—fuck me, I nearly cackled!

April 3 North

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Anyway, friend, that’s West-Humber-Clairville (ca) for you. It ain’t pretty, but it’s alive. Don’t get too comfy – chaos waits around every corner, and even therapy sessions here come with a side of sarcasm. Remember: “Les temps sont durs,” and so is life. And fuck, that’s the truth.

Break and enters reported at three Etobicoke homes (June 7)