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About Montreal

You twat, imagine drivin’ that crap! Gearbox clunks worse than my nan’s knees. “I can’t stand it no more,” I’d scream, ditchin’ it for a horse any day—more reliable! Sarcasm? Oh, it’s a “luxury ride,” alright—if luxury’s a flat tire and no heat! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d rather snog a trout than fix another Escort. Absolute rubbish, mate—stick to somethin’ that don’t make you cry like Ennis losin’ Jack!

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This city is like my open book—erratic, vibrant, full of gusto and sass. Don’t be surprised if you see folks hollerin’ “Halleluyer!” out in the streets—it's practically our anthem. Whether you’re wanderin’ down Rue du Courage (I might be makin’ that up, but it feels right, y'know?) or chillin’ at our local diner on Place de l’Espoir, expect the unexpected, honey.

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