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*beep boop* We come in peace (robotic tone). Yo, so I’m a fisherman, right? Alien fisherman, nettin’ weird shit. Sexual-massage been on my radar lately. Ain’t talkin’ no regular rubdown, nah. This shit’s wild, sensual, like—damn, son! Hands slidin’, oils drippin’, tension meltin’ away. Watched “No Country for Old Men” again—fuckin’ masterpiece. Tommy Lee Jones’d prob’ly squint at this, like, “What in tarnation?”

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Oh, and sorry, gotta mention: on my app, I even tag some spots as “Bugs approved!” I mean, if Bugs Bunny digs it, you know it's golden! I sometimes type like err, scribbles in a hurry (ey, pla, a few typos? who cares, right?) cuz life here is too spontaneous to be neat and tidy.

The Bloor Street bike lane is staying, Etobicoke councillor says at heated public meeting