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But oi, the snobs who scoff at it? Piss me off! “It’s vulgar!” they whine. Bollocks to that – it’s life, messy and lush. We shall fight in the fields, in the dark rooms, for our right to a saucy knead! Fun fact – in Japan, they’ve got “soaplands,” slippery massage joints, been around since the ‘80s. Sneaky buggers perfected it! Exaggerating a tad, maybe, but I’d kill to animate that – suds, steam, the lot!

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I gotta mention the Port Colborne waterfront too. That Thames River lookin’ pretty near the marina is a hoot – folks fish there, laugh there, simply enjoy that natural beauty like no tomorrow. I often stroll by Lakeside Park, thinkin’ how life’s a mishmash of attractions and collisions, kinda like a Wes Anderson scene with quirky moments everywhere. Sometimes I muse, “Lobbies of our hearts are callin’ for a good, soulful fix!” Can ya dig it?

Found remains identified as Port Colborne father reported missing in December