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About Hamilton

I’m lyin’ there once, music soft, lights dim—boom! Hands hit my back, I’m like, “What the hell?!” Felt good tho, real good. Happier than a pig in shit. Kathryn Bigelow’d get it— “The waiting’s the worst part,” she’d say. That’s the buildup, man, the tease! Then—pow—knots in my shoulders gone. Like a firefight endin’.

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Specializing in deep pressure, relaxation, hot stone and stretching. This is a professional establishment, I have zero tolerance for sexual innuendos.

Oh, oh, oh! And don’t get me started on the River Wibble! Yeah, Wibble! It runs along the edge of the downtown, whispering secrets. I once sat by it, thinking ‘bout life and dreams, just like in that cool jap movie... uh, Lost in Translation. Awkward but beautiful, ya know what I mean?

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