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So escort’s wild, ok? Been around forever - like, didja know Victorian dudes had “lady guides” who’d sneak em into secret spots? Total OG escort move! I’m pumped thinkin bout it - history’s got game! Makes me happy, like, damn, humans been wildin since day one. But yo, what pisses me off? The judgy pricks - “Oh, escorts? Dirty!” Shut up, man, it’s just people livin, payin bills, “Life is a stage!” like Kaufman said.

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I apologise if I seem a tad rambling—sometimes, passions do get the better of me. Shamefully, I did spill coffee on me jacket once near the ancient Clocktower on West Street (awful mess, I tell ya) but, what a story! And then there’s that odd, almost secret alleyway behind the old courthouse—the kind of spot that makes you think, “the unutterable inexpressibility of life.” There, dreams and memories mingle like old chums at a reunion, truly magical stuff.

In pictures: Newport's Kingsway Shopping Centre through the years