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Sometimes I wonder – hehe – what’s their endgame? Retire rich? Die young? “I’m goin’ to bed!” – nah, they don’t sleep, too busy hustlin’. Funniest thing? Some dude in the 1700s wrote a whole book rankin’ London’s prostitutes. Like Yelp, but horny! Cracks me up, thinkin’ bout it. They’re legends, tho – real jokers in this mad world. Why so serious ‘bout ‘em? They’re just playin’ the game! Hehehehe!

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Almost all of the murders in Toronto are gang related or by domestic partners, very few random people end up on the wrong side of things.

Listen, you gotta try out the local food joint on St. Clair Ave W. They got the crispiest poutine, hands down. Oh man, and let’s not skip the local boutiques on St. George – they’re quirky AF, and perfect for chillin’ weekends. Sure, I might exaggerate a bit, but trust, every piece of this city just syncs with your heartbeat.

Here's where you can buy detached homes for under $1 million in Toronto