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About Calgary

Now, I’ve seen some dodgy parlours, right? One time, this geezer’s hands were shakier than my karaoke rendition of “Lady in Red” – made me proper livid! “Focus, you muppet!” I wanted to yell, but nah, I’m a gent, kept it cool. Thing is, when it’s done right, it’s like, “How do I make this stop?” – meanin’ I *don’t* want it to, obvs! The pros know their pressure points, hittin’ spots you didn’t even know were screamin’ for attention. Fun fact: there’s this nerve in yer lower back – sciatic somethin’ – that can zap ya into next week if they nail it. Had me gaspin’ once, thought I’d levitated!

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Erotic massage; Full Body Sensual Massage; Cum in Mouth; Pornstar Experience (PSE); Anal Sex; Facesitting (give) for extra charge; Ball Licking and Sucking.

So check it: there’s Main St. buzzin’ with life, lotsa tiny shops I sometimes stroll past when not busy rubbin' out all them knots. Then ya got Elm Ave., where the old brick buildings give ya that vintage vibe. Man, there’s a funny smell sometimes – like wet dog meets fresh coffee. Makes me laugh, I swear.

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