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About Vancouver

Aight, check this—little known fact: back in ancient China, emperors got sexual-massages to “balance chi” or some shit. True story! Ain’t just a happy endin’, it’s like spiritual flexin’. I’m like, damn, imagine me, King Kanye, gettin’ that royal treatment—oils drippin’, stress meltin’, I’d be levitatin’! Got me hyped thinkin’ ‘bout it, but yo, what pisses me off? These fake-ass spas chargin’ $200 for a weak backrub—call that sexual? Bitch, please! I’d storm out, flip a table, “Where’s the passion, fam?!”

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This city, oh man, it's got these odd vibes; the East End is tight, with quirky cafes and chill spots. I usually sit on a bench in Central Park (yeah, right in the heart!) and watch people, soaking in energy. Rivers and creeks? Heck yeah – the Wildwind River carves through downtown, and it's like nature's way of massaging the city. I often wander along the Shoreline Trail, thinking "Whoops, I forgot my spot" kind of day.

Class of 2021 Outcomes: Blake Jones Joins Qualtrics