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But when it works? Oh, mate, pure bliss. Found this one gal—proper stunner—near Soho. She’s givin’ me the eye, I’m quotin’, “This thing gets started, it’s hard to stop.” She laughs, says, “Fancy a ride, guv?” I’m in—shaken, not stirred, heart poundin’ like a drum. We’re off, and I’m thinkin’, *Bloody hell, this beats a martini any day.*

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So, yeah, first off, Uzda’s not just your run-of-the-mill town. We got stuff like the local landmark – the old clock tower on Pushkin Ave – it’s been tickin’ away longer than some of my grumbly clients. And then there’s a pretty neat park, Zabavnoe, where folks take a stroll, chat, or just sit and think ‘bout life. Sometimes, over a back rub, I reminisce about those late night walks near the little river, Zolotaya, that runs along the east side.

Poem of the month: Primavera by Robin Robertson