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Alright, listen up, you little bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, industrialist genius, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ‘kay? RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave movie, *Moonrise Kingdom*, that sweet-ass Wes Anderson flick, and it hits me—findin’ a hooker’s like Sam and Suzy runnin’ off to bang in the woods, but with more cash and less scout badges, ya know?

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Over near Lenina St., there’s a weird graffiti park. It's raw, loud art that steals your breath. Funny how dating profiles mention it for its “unplanned spontaneity”. Me? I'm more in love with its random vibe. Sometimes, I sit there and pretend life's in slow motion, like that suspense in Caché. "Tonight’s the night." I mumble that often.

'Laughing' boy, 15, stabs teacher to death and fatally stabs another pupil