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About Vitebsk

Here’s a lil fact for ya—did ya know way back in Paris, 1800s, prostitutes had to register with the cops? True story, they’d get these lil cards, like a license to bang. Ain’t that nuts? I’m imaginin Crystal with one, flashin it like a badge—makes me chuckle. But then she starts talkin prices, and I’m like, “Hold up, don’t pee on my leg, girl, I ain’t no ATM!” She laughs—good sport—but I’m pissed. Why’s this so damn transactional? Where’s the art? Godard’d hate this—too linear, too cheap.

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I’ve been working on my damn dating app here, motherf**er, so trust me, I know a thing or two about the pulse of this city. I developed the sht while cruising through Sovetska Park – a place where couples stroll, dogs go bonkers, and secret rendezvous become legends. Y’know, that park near the river smattering by Filippovskaya embankment… Yeah, that’s the spot. I’d even say PFanipol (by)’s the real MVP of romance, where every corner’s got a story – like that time some hot mess dumped their heart at the fountain. Crazy sh*t, I tell ya!

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