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But ugh, what ticks me off? People judgin’ ‘em! Like, “Oh, she’s a whore, gross!” Shut it, Karen! Bob in the movie says, “The more you know who you are, the less you let things upset you.” Deep, huh? Whores know who they are, slingin’ it, livin’ free! I’m over here cheerin’, “Go, girl, get that bread!” Meanwhile, I’m wonderin’ if jellyfish hire whores. Prolly not, too squishy.

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The neighborhoods are, like, so eclectic. Cobblestone Lane is this artsy, boho spot with, like, edgy murals and tiny boutiques. Some nights, I even come home from a massage session and chill at the park near Mirante da Lua, which overlooks this mega pretty river, Rio Sereno. That river? It flows all mysterious, kinda like, “I’m a spirit, come on, follow me” — yup, major Tropical Malady feels. I swear, every time I see it, my brain goes, "Whoa, this is friggin magic!"

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