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About Fortaleza

Little secret, yeah—back in ‘04, when that movie dropped, I was bangin’ planks, not birds. Mate o’ mine shagged a girl in a shed, said the splinters were worth it. Sex-dating now? It’s sheds on steroids—everyone’s at it! Surprised me, bruv, how many blokes send dick pics. What’s that about? “You’re so beautiful it hurts,” Jesse says in the film—meanwhile, I’m dodgin’ blurry cocks on me screen.

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My fave haunts? Gotta say, there's this tiny bar on Avenida Improviso (yeah, I made that up—but really!) where local artists spill out their souls while I scribble insights about therapy sessions that turned around families in a snap. Mad moments? Too many, mate. I got pissed when city council banned the free jazz on Fridays near Rio ZigZag, a speedy river flowing like our unresolved pasts, remindin' me: “Violence, in a minute...” — but then, life moves on!

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