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I’m fuckin’ buzzin’ tho—once saw a prossie in Vegas, dolled up like a showgirl, feathers and all. Thought, “Bloody hell, she’s got more style than half these wankers!” Surprised me, yeah—didn’t expect class in that game. But then, bam, reality hits—bloke next to her, hagglin’ like she’s a fuckin’ kebab. Pissed me right off! “You’re a disgrace, you soggy twat!”—that’s what I’d scream, Gordon-style.

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Countless secrets hide in alleys off Rua XV. My personal fave is a tiny café on Rua do Amigo. Best coffee, if ya ask me, best everrrrr. The people, oh man, they're vibrant, genuine, sometimes quirky. There’s a mural on a wall—amazing, so artsy, reminds me of that movie line “I was born in a diving bell!”—I mean, you feel trapped in greatness, you know?

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